Walzilla

This came for my neighbor. I accidentally picked it up thinking it was the table runner I'd recently ordered from Williams Sonoma. When I opened the package I realized my mistake, but fell in love with the graphic on the t-shirt so I decided to keep it for myself. It was awkward cuz I live in the same building as the guy, but I figured, hey, if I'm gonna do this might as well bite the bullet and wear it around the neighborhood. The first time he saw me it was weird for sure. There was a brief pause as he processed the fact that I probably stole his shirt. Then I just started screaming unhinged noises like BOOGABOOGA! And HEEHAR! And contorting my face thinking he'd assume I was a total looncicle and steer clear. The whole thing was 100% improvised and it worked. Anyways, very cool shirt.

There's nothing like a shirt that screams "I have a hiatal hernia and I don't care who knows it!

Jessica, if you’re reading this, I’m sorry. 4/5

Wow! This thing is surprisingly absorbent!

When that giant walrus attacked Union Square, I was like "oh, heck no they're not gonna make t-shirts out of it," but then I saw the design and I was like "this is really tasteful considering the horrible tragedy that just occurred." So I bought three.